Ways to remember people
Ways to remember people at special times of the year
There will be many moments when you will want to remember the person who died. However, special occasions such as birthdays and anniversaries can evoke more memories than usual.
Some people find it helpful to mark these occasions by creating activities to remember the person who died (see the suggestions below). Winston’s Wish Young Ambassador Liv Kyte, whose mum died in 2007, talks about how she spends Mother’s Day and suggests some ideas for remembering those special moments.
“Mother’s Day is never an easy time of year for me. Like most events throughout the year – birthdays, Christmas etc. there will always be that one person who is missing. But there’s no reason why you can’t turn that into a happy feeling rather than a sad one.
I lost my mum to cancer just before Christmas in 2007. When these events are looming in my family we have learned that the best way to keep smiles on our faces (as we know that’s what she would have wanted) is to be together. Having a close group of family or friends around you means you can remember together and keep each other’s spirits high.
With Mother’s Day coming up there are constant reminders – TV adverts and billboards and every shop is filled with cards and teddy bears. Every time I see these I picture my mum smiling back at me and remember some of the best Mother’s Days we had. This makes me feel lucky that we had those times together instead of being sad that she isn’t here.
On the actual day I will always be with my sister. There are lots of ways people find useful to remember their loved one and we most enjoy looking at photos! Before my mum died she was so determined to create strong and lasting memories for us as we grew older that she completed a photo album for every year of our lives. There’s nothing more effective to spark a happy emotion than a picture of you and your mum.
We will talk about fun things we did together, holidays and her silly humour. Even her annoying habits at times because they make us laugh now and hey, she was only human! We also have a memory box full of old cards and memorabilia of times we spent together. As my mum was fighting cancer for seven years she had the time to create these albums and boxes for us. If you don’t already have one I would definitely recommend getting a box, a tin or a book and filling it with whatever items bring back happy memories for you.
As well as all this we try to remember that if we are feeling sad and low that it doesn’t matter, it’s natural and the best remedy is to cuddle up on a comfy sofa with a duvet and one of her favourite movies – Father of the Bride – and a good cup of tea!”